Title: “Moriarty’s Monster Hunt”


I dislike AI . In fact, AI isn’t an actual thing. We people hear the phrase “artificial intelligence” they are likely to picture HAL from 2001 a Space Odyssey, or R2-D2 from Star Wars, or the cute kid from Steven Spielberg’s Stanley Kubrick pastiche AI: Artificial Intelligence or some other pop-culture touchstone. LLMs (Large Language Models) and other so-called “generative A.I.” are nothing like that at all. ChatGP, etc are simply gussied up predictive text models. They lack creativity, reason, desires, or anything that we would recognize as thought.

            I highly recommend reading Thomas Searle (Minds, Brain Science) and other philosophers on the matter. The ChineseRoom thought experiment should be revelatory for anyone.


I decided to do a little experiment with Bing Copilot (their free AI chatbot). I gave it two prompts:


write a story in which American Actor Michael Moriarty is tasked with hunting down and killing monsters from various movies he has been in, but in real life. Look at films like Q: The Winged Serpent, The Stuff, It's Alive 3: Island of the Alive, Dark Tower, etc.\


Write a very long essay about the film Dark Tower starring Michael Moriarty. Cite your sources.

Here are the results:



Title: “Moriarty’s Monster Hunt”

Chapter 1: The Call

Michael Moriarty, the seasoned actor known for his roles in cult horror films, sat in his dimly lit New York apartment. The phone rang, shattering the silence. He picked up, expecting another interview or perhaps a fan’s enthusiastic voice.

“Mr. Moriarty,” a gravelly voice said, “we need your unique skills.”

Moriarty frowned. “Who is this?”

“Call me Agent Blackwood. Monsters from your movies have crossed over into our world. They’re wreaking havoc. We need you to hunt them down.”

Moriarty chuckled. “Monsters? You mean like the winged serpent from ‘Q’?”

“Exactly. And the living dessert from ‘The Stuff.’ And the mutant babies from ‘It’s Alive 3.’ They’re real, Mr. Moriarty. And they’re dangerous.”

Chapter 2: The First Encounter

Armed with a silver dagger and a worn-out script from “Q,” Moriarty ventured into the subway tunnels. The air smelled of decay, and eerie echoes bounced off the walls. He followed the trail of blood, leading him to a nest of feathers and bones.

The winged serpent emerged, its eyes glowing crimson. Moriarty’s heart raced. He recited lines from the film, hoping they held power in this twisted reality. The serpent lunged, but Moriarty dodged, slashing with his dagger. The creature screeched, dissolving into ash.

Chapter 3: The Stuff Unleashed

In an abandoned factory, Moriarty faced the living dessert. It oozed and bubbled, consuming everything in its path. He remembered the film’s climax: “You can’t get enough of The Stuff!” But this wasn’t fiction; it hungered for human flesh.

Moriarty improvised. He lured the creature into a vat of acid, watching it dissolve. His hands trembled; this was no movie set.

Chapter 4: Island of the Alive

On a remote island, Moriarty confronted the mutant babies. Their cries echoed through the jungle. He whispered lines from “It’s Alive 3,” hoping to soothe them. But these weren’t misunderstood creatures—they were killers.

He tracked them to a cave, where they guarded their queen. Moriarty hesitated. Could he kill innocent-looking infants? But they lunged, teeth sharp. He fought back, tears blurring his vision.

Chapter 5: The Dark Tower

The final battle awaited atop a crumbling tower. Moriarty faced the embodiment of evil—a fusion of all his movie monsters. The dark tower pulsed, threatening to tear reality apart.

He recited lines from every film, channeling their essence. The tower trembled, cracks forming. Moriarty lunged, plunging his dagger into its heart. The world quaked, then settled.

Agent Blackwood appeared. “You’ve saved us, Mr. Moriarty.”

Moriarty wiped blood from his face. “Just call me Michael.”

And so, Michael Moriarty, actor turned monster hunter, stepped into the shadows, forever guarding the thin veil between fiction and reality.









Dark Tower (1987): A Supernatural Thriller Set in Barcelona

The 1987 horror film “Dark Tower”, directed by Freddie Francis (credited as Ken Barnett), stars Michael MoriartyJenny Agutter, and Theodore Bikel. Filmed in the Spanish city of Barcelona, this suspenseful movie weaves a tale of supernatural forces, mysterious deaths, and a haunted office tower.

Plot Summary:

After a window washer falls to his death from a Barcelona high-rise, security consultant Dennis Randall (played by Michael Moriarty) investigates. More gruesome deaths occur inside and around the office building, leading Randall to uncover a sinister force that hates humans. As the body count rises, he realizes there’s a malevolent supernatural entity at work.

Production and Release:

·         Ken Wiederhorn wrote the script based on a story by Robert J. Avrech. The film was produced by Tom Fox through his production company Greenfox Films in collaboration with Howard International Pictures.

·         Filming took place on location in Barcelona.

·         Notably, due to dissatisfaction with the special effects quality, Freddie Francis had his name removed from the film, replaced by the pseudonym Ken Barnett.


·         TV Guide awarded the film one out of five stars, describing it as a “dull, talky, and incoherent haunted-skyscraper suspense thriller.”


1.      Wikipedia

2.      IMDb

In summary, “Dark Tower” offers a blend of horror, mystery, and supernatural intrigue, set against the backdrop of Barcelona’s eerie office tower. Its troubled production history and unique premise make it a noteworthy entry in the genre. 🎥🌆

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That's the drivel it produced. Have you found an actual use (beyond plagiarism) for the AI that exists? Tell us about it in the comments.