The Call of Harrison Ford's Beard

I have not seen the new Call of the Wild film. In fact, I don’t think that I have ever seen any filmed version of the tale. I think I can remember some of Jack London’s best known novel from when I read it in the third grade, but it’s really hazy. I mean super hazy. Like, it has a dog in it or something, right? What I want to talk about is the trailer and a few clips that have been making the rounds online. 

It seems that Disney’s scientists once again have been too busy asking if they could to bother asking of they should. They have ventured deep into the famed valley uncanny to capture a fully CGI dog.  Yes, friends, the dog in the Call of the Wild is photo-realistic animation mapped over a motion capture actor. And when I say “motion capture actor” I don’t mean a flesh and blood dog. I mean a dude. A contortionist covered in ping pong balls pantomimed being a dog and they CGI’d “dog” over his pretend dog antics.

It’s ugly, folks. I mean, look at just how not real dog this dog is:

I honestly would be more likely to see this film of they had used a real dog and a CGI Harrison Ford